ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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