i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Randomize
