i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
