margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
your room smells of hookers.
And success
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
