Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
