ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
Randomize