My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
