The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Randomize
