a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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