How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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