i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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