she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
