Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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