so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
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