i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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