you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
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