i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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