Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Randomize
