Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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