That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Randomize
