O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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