So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Randomize