Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
