Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
This baby is an asshole
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
