In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
