i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Randomize
