Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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