You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
