Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Holy shit dude........stairs
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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