im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
