Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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