Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
