.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
