so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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