I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
