I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Randomize
