nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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