You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
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