i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
