That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Randomize
