Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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