Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize