She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Randomize
