I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize
