with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
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