I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
