But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
with your own penis?
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize
