I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
