I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
