:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
